Do I look like Buddha to you?

So, it happened. Someone touched my stomach. Here are a few reasons I do not appreciate it, not one bit.

1. I don’t even look pregnant yet. This person just knows that I am and so they felt my stomach, without any warning what-so-ever.

2. I really didn’t think this was going to happen for a couple more months, and if it becomes a habit now, I don’t know what I’ll do. I may have to wear a sign that says, “Yes I am knocked up and no you may not touch my stomach.”

3. This person, specifically, knows how far along I am so I am not quite sure what they were expecting to feel. Sorry to disappoint.

People touching pregnant stomachs has always annoyed me. It is the worst when you see a complete stranger walk up to someone and just start rubbing. Good Lord. I can tell you right now that I will not handle that well if and when it happens.

Friends and family, fine. I will grin and bear it.


Hot feet

This happened back in March, but I can still smell it like it was yesterday. Let me preface by saying that my nose has always been hyper-sensitive. I can already smell things that no one else can, so being preggers has made it that much worse. I was headed home for lunch, and Kenny had the day off. He was smoking ribs for dinner. As soon as I got out of my car, I could smell the smoker and it was delicious. I was excited to get inside to tell Kenny how fantastic everything smelled , when it hit me like a ton of bricks. The second I opened the door, the smell of hot vinegar hit my face. My eyes started to water and I gagged. I instantly got really upset and felt myself wanting to cry. Let me also say, that I am not a crier. Not in the least bit. Well, at least I wasn't. I walked, or stormed, in and said, "Oh my God. What the hell Kenny? You couldn't have called to tell me the house smelled like feet?" I was irate (on the outside) but knew I was being ridiculous (on the inside). I even went so far as to microwave my soup and eat outside, on the concrete, where is was 35 degrees.

I went around the house and shut all the doors, opened all the windows, and turned all the fans on. It was still 35 degrees outside. Yikes. Kenny and I were already laughing about it before I even headed back to work, but the fact that I got so upset is hilarious to me.


Just the beginning

My cousin is super awesome and bought us our crib for the new room. She was awesome before, but you know what I mean. The dressers that are in the room we are going to use are antique, and so I wanted the crib to match. Then, when we were in Boulder I saw some really cute bedding-loved the brand. I went online when we got home and decided on this one. It's Litto Kids Magic Garden. A lot more modern then the furniture and the wall art I find will be modern as well. I really like to mix it up. I figured if it is a girl we can add pink, and if it is a boy (fingers crossed) we will bring in more blues and greens. Both are at the house and may or may not be out of their packaging.


Ice cream cake

A few weeks ago I was headed over to Kim and Brad's after work and was supposed to bring dessert. About 4 minutes before I had to go, I still had not decided on anything. A coworker told me about this, and it was a hit! Super easy and tastes great!

9 x 13 pan
2 packages of ice-cream sandwiches (12 count)
Cool whip-the bigger one
1 jar of caramel sauce
1 jar of chocolate fudge

Start by lining the bottom of the pan with ice cream sandwiches. Next layer the caramel and chocolate-the more the better. Put another layer of sandwiches on top. Spread cool whip over that and then drizzle remaining chocolate and caramel on top. Put back in freezer. It looks like a cake when you are finished. You have to work quick, because the ice cream sandwiches start to melt and everything begins to slide around!


Killed the rabbit

So, when Kenny and I told Karena that I was preggers, she mentioned something about killing a rabbit. We had no idea what she was talking about, so we just kindof ignored the statement and moved on. Then, Mary Ann said the same thing. What the hell? She went on to tell us that back in the day they used to inject rabbits with urine and if the woman was pregnant, the rabbit would die. First of all, that is horribly mean. Second of all, I thought it sounded totally fake. I was pretty convinced Mary Ann, Karena, and Kimberly were the only people that knew about it. So, I went to one of my favorite sites, Snopes.com…..FALSE!!! The truth is still pretty awful, but I am glad I cracked the case!


How I told Kenny

My Thursday that week was spent buying and taking pee stick tests. They all came back with ghost lines. So faint, I wasn't sure if I was seeing things. I called the Dr. and they couldn’t get me in until 2 weeks later.

Screw that.

I knew Planned Parenthood would take walk-ins for that sort of thing, so I went by there. The test came back negative. What a flippin' waste of money.

Still not convinced, I thought I would just wait it out. The only problem was that I was supposed to meet my mom and some other people for happy hour the next evening. Kindof needed to know if I could have a beer or not.

I went out to dinner with Linds that evening and ended up telling her about my day. She told me to go buy more tests and take them in the morning. Sounded like a hassle, so I just went home and went to bed.

Kenny had no clue about my day. I told him nothing.

Friday at lunch, I left work, and on my way home I couldn’t take it any more. I went and bought another test. After taking it and waiting 2 minutes, I was still not totally satisfied with the result. "YES" or "NO" works a lot better than a million shades of a pink or blue lines. I know that if you see a line, you are preggo. No matter how faint. Still didn't believe it. I called Lindsley and told her about my dilemma. She told me to come over and show her and that is exactly what I did.

Friday night, I was waiting outside in my car for my mom to get to the bar and I was texting Kenny. There was a lot of small talk and then I spilled it.

Me: Ugh. It is going to be so annoying going to the bar and not being able to drink!

Kenny: Why aren't you drinking?

Me: (sent picture of test taken with blue cross on it)

Kenny: Holy S! You are preggers?!?

Me: So it seems.

Yes internet. I told Kenny over a text and I wouldn't change it for anything. Linds was trying to help me think of a cute and clever way to tell him and after thinking about it, I wanted no part of it. Anyone that knows me is not surprised that I did it that way and Kenny thought it was hilarious. We actually told his siblings via text as well.

The moms got a grandma card on their doors at their homes. My mom was less than thrilled (by the way we told her) , but that's a whole other blog.


My pants are so on fire

I would like to take this moment to apologize to everyone. I have been a bit fat liar pants for the past few months.

Here are the real reasons I did not go to/participate in the following:

Tony's with my mom and coworkers on February 6th: I said I was not drinking because Kenny and I were going to work out after I left. The real reason was because I found out I was preggers about 5 hours earlier.

Canceled getting a peel from Alison: Apparently putting acid on your skin is not good for a growing embryo.

St. Patrick's party at Kris and Patrick's: I said I woke up feeling horrible. Truth is, second hand smoke, and a lot of it, is also not good for a growing embryo.

St. Patrick's Day: I told all my friends they were lame for not getting back to me but really, I didn't "advertise" like I normally do, because I couldn't enjoy the day anyway! No green beer? Sacrilege!

I also lied to Amy about doing the Muddy Buddy this year. I avoided beer and alcohol on way too many occasions. I turned down a margarita-unheard of. Napa was a little less delicious because of the absence of wine in my stomach.

And sorry Linda, Pete and whoever else for lying straight to you face when you just came out and said/asked if I was. But, frankly, I do get asked all the time. It seems that the second someone is married, that is the only question people ask from there on out! Granted, it just happened to be true this time.

For those of you that feel I should have told you a long time ago, don’t be mad. Very few people knew-mostly just immediate family. It was hard keeping it from everyone, but we felt better waiting a while.

Due date: November 12th


I could so easily be huuuuuuuuge

This site is hilarious. Thisiswhyyourefat.com is a site dedicated to photos of "disgusting" foods. Um.....looking through all of them, I would say more then 80% looked pretty delicious to me. I have a serious problem. I would have to pass on the Twinkie Wiener Sandwich-a hot dog served between Twinkies and then topped with Cheez Whiz. I even have limits.


Reusable baggies

I just bought these adorable reusable baggies from a little shop at Etsy. They are great for anything dry. Since Kenny started working in Denver and he now brings his lunch every day and I am trying to bring more snacks to work, these are perfect! We put "wet stuff" (like melon) in Tupperware, and use wrap-n-mats for our sandwiches. No waste here!


To do list

1. Stop eating for at least one hour out of the day. Time I am sleeping does not count, although it totally should.

2. Clean my house. I mean really clean it. The outside and inside have started to become one with the grass bits and little dirty paw prints on the floor. Also, the dust-bunnies may or may not be close to the same size as the dogs.

3. Get some sun. Not a lot. Just enough. I think being almost translucent is wrong in so many ways.

4. Go through my DVR. I have no clue why half the shows on there are being recorded, but it is taking up “Keeping up with the Kardashians” room. And, while I am at it, go through my “friends”. Get rid of some of those too.

5. Get next Wednesday’s post ready. It’s a good one, Internet.