FYI, if there is ever a bug in our house it is best if Kenny is there to take care of it. Spiders are the worst. Let me break it down for you.
How Kenny handles it:
1. Kill the spider
2. Throw the spider in the trash
How I handle it:
1. See the spider and then freeze in fear
2. Stare at it for another minute or so to make sure it isn’t going to move
3. If the spider is not going to make a crunching noise when I kill it, go to get one of Kenny’s shoes. The sheer size of his shoe alone almost guarantees that the spider will not be able to climb on the shoe and touch me
4. Stare at the spider some more to plot its demise
5. Oh my God. It looked at me. Back away from the spider
6. Throw the shoe at it in hopes the weight of the shoe will crush it
7. Argh! It looked at me again
8. Throw the shoe a second time because I missed
9. Look at it all crinkled on the ground
10. Put Kenny’s shoe on and step on it again, just to make sure it’s dead
11. Get approximately 1 entire roll of paper towels to pick it up and flush it. I can’t just throw it away, it could come back to life, climb out of the trash and touch me
12. The next 10 times I use that bathroom, I check the seat and bowl just to make sure it didn’t crawl back up the pipe and onto the seat to have its revenge. You never know if you killed a spider with scuba skills
13. Walk around the house for the next week, month, year will eyes peeled waiting for the next one and just hoping Kenny is home to take care of it
6 comments:
I feel ya! The only difference in your senerio and mine is that Joe wouldn't kill the spider, he'd take it outside and let it go. He's a lover of all things nature.
Even the creepy things.
I hate when people do that! That just give those things an opportunity to come back in! Yuck.
I have a pretty similar routine, except I have to use one of my own shoes....ewww. And when it's out of reach or in a carpeted area I use the vacuum. However that method always leaves me wondering if it's going to find its way out of there (kind of like the toilet situation)!
Hilarious! I was laughing because I'm pretty sure those are the same steps I go through:) And, the worst is when you find one in your bed and have to check the sheets and pillow case before bed every night just to make sure his offspring aren't hiding waiting to crawl on you! What makes it even worse is that Brad is just as scared of spiders as I am!
I was totally almost late to work this morning because of a bug situation.
Amanda-Kenny gets seriously annoyed with me when he is home and I ask him to kill something. He doesn't understand why I can do it when he's not there, but can't possibly do it when he is.
I'd really like to judge you. However, when I lived in Texas I once called my mother in Colorado seriously hoping she would fly down and take care of the lizard that appeared out of nowhere underneath the loaf of bread I had just put on the counter. I was in such a panic I gave her the impression there were hundreds of lizards in my apartment.
Obviously she couldn't help me, so I retreated to my office and called my boyfriend over and over and over and over and over again until he answered and went to my apartment to take care of the situation.
I woke him up. He wasn't happy.
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